a love lost but never forgotten

you by parokya ni edgar…

your love…

taz, mymy, dydy…

sun, smart, globe…bisag asa basta unlimited…

clara marja…

swapping of shirts, movies, long nights…

smoking, videoke, TTh, 4Bs…

breakingpoint, boss, catmon, ayala, sm, talamban, ramos…

moon cafe… =,(

sunday afternoons, barbeque…

smash fm, monster radio, w-rock…

shades, shopping…

paragon, labangon…

dogbites, paso, kalibanga, hyperacidity (Tums!), tipalo…

february 12, 15, 2005

september 11, 2005 =,(

…will forever be missed and cherish

a love given, and will never be taken back…forever

…sorry

…wishing, hoping, waiting

…hating…and then giving up…

…but forever loving…

"I take one step away, but i find myself coming back, to you, my one and only, one and only YOU."

adcon dude!!!

19th PAC! watta blast!

bagong trip: writing songs

I don’t know whether you’ll like this song i wrote or what, after all i just wrote it in just 15 minutes plus the lyrics are really shallow. if you ask me if this song has got to do with my life now, i guess in a way, it is, but it it shouldn’t be misunderstood or analyzed as something exactly identical to any specific situation-if you get what i mean. (coz i kinda didn’t.)

anyway i hope i could learn to play the guitar or the piano so i could put music to it… sigh.. =)

You’ll Never Be
-manzky-

i’m lighting up another stick of cigarette
and still you didn’t call
i’ve fnished two packs of marlboro reds
now the rain’s about to fall

coz maybe you’ll never come
you’ll never see
you’ll never be…..

CHORUS
You’ll never be mine!
even for a thousand years
coz all you see when you look at me
is not me
even for a thousand years
you’ll never figure it out…(never figure it out)

and now im staring out of the window
and on your pictures on my wall
you’ve never seen this side of me before
coz im your best bud after all

and now i know you’ll never come
you’ll never see
you’ll never be…

CHORUS
You’ll never be mine!
even for a thousand years
coz all you see when you look at me
is not me
even for a thousand years
you’ll never figure it out…(never figure it out)

so now we’re talking bout your heartaches over
some bottles of beer
and i just wanna smash them on your face
are you too blind to see or plain insensitive
just wanna stop acting in this play

coz you’ll never come
you’ll never see
you’ll never be…
You’ll never be mine!

you may never get to read this

i’m counting the days and the nights and i wonder, when will all of these things end? it’s amazing how two people could easily fall apart, one forgetting so easily and one eternally haunted by what was lost. it would be nice to say that i belong to the former, but i would know deep down in my heart that it isn’t true…

to the one that got away, i know that you are living a whole new life now. one that doesn’t include me. and sometimes, i wonder if you remember how you lived your life with me too…would it be filled with bad memories or would the happy ones overtake the bad?

sometimes i try to kill myself with thinking, "what could they be doing right now," or ask questions such as "will she ever know how much i loved you?" its hard knowing that sometimes, i too could also answer these questions. it’s just that i am afraid to know.

there are mornings i wake up and feel that i have moved on and that i am okay, and then again there are just evernings when i just can’t stop thinking about the whole thing over and over again, until it kills me, until it nauseates me, until i am engulfed in one big blanket of remorse.  and the pain is just, still there.

there are times when your already too ashamed to open up to your friends because its been so long, and as far as they’re concerned your already okay. times when you feel that you’d have to embrace the burden alone and suffocate without anyone knowing that your dying inside.

but then again, it would all be so lame if i wade in this pool of grief. but until the time comes that i would have stood up, walked forward and rest assured that i would never turn back, i just have to bear with all these first.

someday, better things would happen.